Minimalism – Minimalist Moment

In 2012 I was exposed to minimalism for the first time. I considered myself as “pursing minimalism.” I would give myself the title of minimalist- too grand and great for me! But I aspired to it.

But 10 years later, as I sat in my home with toys strewn on floor and dishes piling up, and frankly: clutter, I couldn’t help but feel like a failure. Where did I go wrong? I read Marie Kondo, Fumio Sasaki, and more, I’d purged over 2,000 things within my 6 months of pursing minimalism… I wrote for a minimalist blog! What happened?

Maybe you have felt this way too- you’ve done the work but haven’t been able to achieve the social media perfection you were all but promised.

Well, I have good news: you’re not a failure. You are dynamic.

Dynamic means there’s always growth, change, evolution. There’s new seasons to life, new jobs, people, world events (I’m looking at you 2020), life events, attitudes, losses and gains.

IF you NEVER changed, you could probably achieve and keep you aesthetic triumph effortlessly, without the need to reassess. But you are not static, and the world around you isn’t either, so you must shift with the ebb and flow of life.

Example:

We didn’t have kids. I never had to curate a toy collection. Then we had a kid. So, it kinda caught me off guard when I became overwhelmed with toys everywhere! And I had even rejected and returned a LOT of toys we had received. Well, now we have a kid, so we have toys, so guess what? I gotta readjust.

Another:

2020 shut down our gym. My husband is energized by exercise. We purchased gym equipment. Some we used, some just gathered dust. I could mourn over mistakes. Or I could just say “Ah, lesson learned!” and move forward.

If I wasn’t dynamic, I won’t have encountered these problems. But I also wouldn’t have ALL the AMAZING things that come from a dynamic life.

So, rather than being ashamed that I need to declutter again or my life has changed and gotten messy in new ways, I decided to re-evaluate what we needed and needed to do to make our lives function simply and easily. Again. And NOT to view it as a failure. Success! My life is growing! I have opportunity to clear out the old and make way for the new! Like a tree sheds it’s leaves in winter, I’m letting old things go, and making way for the new to come. Those old things weren’t a mistake (ok, maybe a few were,) just like a tree’s new leaves each year aren’t a mistake. They were appropriate for that season. Now they aren’t. Simple!

Once I accepted the need for change without shame, I was able to see what needed to be done clearly and got to it! Now, I’m so pleased and thankful for the new flow we have and I’m not afraid to tweak it as needed!

Plus, I’m not afraid to say “yep, I got in some bad habits.” Im happy to refresh my non-consumer habits and humbly revisit some wonderful resources to learn and relearn!

Don’t be ashamed to do things over again, you dynamic being.

We can do this!

Thanks for visiting.

If you’re living with someone who doesn’t ascribe to a minimalist lifestyle, don’t despair! There are plenty of folks in this same situation, coexisting peacefully. Is it tough sometimes? Yep. And, no, its not ideal. But c’est la vie. Here are 2 key points to keep in mind and some bonus tips! Lets get practical.

1. You can’t change someone else.

Classic psychology, eh? But its true, and generally people resent being forced into anything. (Imagine if they tried to make you a maximalist?) Not everyone has to be a minimalist. WOW. It may seem strange, especially if you’ve reached the point where you feel that minimalism is a great way to live. But everyone has a different way of going about things. If your loved one comes to a realization that minimalism is the best method for them- awesome! But remember that you had to reach a particular point in your life before exploring it, and maybe they do too.

2. You can (casually) display a different way.

Just do your thing. Seeing a simpler way (when its not being pushed down your throat) can really appeal. For example, after seeing how little I pack for trips, my husband was intrigued and started asking me for packing advice. Of course I was delighted! And all it took was packing my bag. Another small example is my bedside table. I keep it pretty minimal. Over the past few years my husband’s bedside has also become more and more minimal.

Bonus Tips

Enjoy your own journey instead of stressing over someone else.

I will admit that I did not exercise as much self control as I should have when I first started learning about minimalism. Guys, its so exciting, you just want to share all of the new and fascinating information! Its ok if you did this too. Just try to be cognizant that your roomie may be a little freaked out by what might seem like a radical way of living. I have an advantage in having a great husband who is always open to learning. He is also very patient as I’ve explored minimalism and talked out my personal developments and journey. Maybe that helps too though, because it makes it more about what I’m learning and growing in and less about lecturing or nagging him to do the same. Give them time.

Use minimalism to their advantage.

Example: I offered to go through my husbands receipts. They build up a bunch and he hates sorting through them. I put together a system of a couple different jars for him to make it easier. Eventually we stopped saving any receipts except work expenses, but he felt grateful and was open to more change after he saw minimalism working for him. Find a painful clutter area and offer to fix it (then use minimalism.)

When they ask, offer alternatives.

Maybe you don’t need fill-in-the-blank. If they express frustration with something, offer to help with a minimalist alternative. One of the best choices (and most tentative) was getting rid of our printer. It was a pain for us to go out and get the cartridges at the last minute and though we used it multiple times a year, it really wasn’t often enough to justify the space it took up and the cost of the cartridges ($70 each! Crazy!) I knew it was a big stress for both of us, so I presented him with an alternative idea: printing at Staples. It was scary to get rid of at first, but now I can’t imagine why we kept it so long. Staples, Office Max, Office Depot or any print shop can do the job easily and its now cents to dollars a year instead of double or even triple digits per year for those little ink cartridges.

Offer your benefits.

I found a great toothbrush that utilized reusable batteries, was electric, very small, easy to travel with and the stand doubled as a case. Since I was getting one for myself I casually offered to order my husband one too. I explained the benefits and he liked. Now we both have one and I have gotten rid of our old brushes, travel cases, and chargers. Ha!

In another situation, I started using shampoo bars for easy travel and less plastic. When he expressed interest, of course I offered to let him to use them anytime. Now I’ll be ordering more, but in peppermint since he likes the scent. No more ugly plastic bottles!

Now you have some great tips and tricks under your belt, have at it! Enjoy your journey and respect others. We can do this.

Thanks for visiting!

Tag: Minimalism

Minimalist Failure? No. Dynamic.

Living with a Nonminimalist